I've been roundly criticized for having a contract and a formal set of rules. It's never bothered me, because the way I play is the way I play, and unless you have a safety/medical concern, your opinion doesn't matter.
However, I think it's valuable for those new to the lifestyle--or even those who have just "winged it" for years--to understand why I and others find value in contracts.
No, we're not copying off of 50 Shade of Grey. Stop that. That's fiction, and not a guide to a BDSM lifestyle. Nobody talks a virgin into signing a contract like that. Okay, no responsible dominant would talk a virgin, who can't have informed consent, into signing a contract like that. Well, not so much talked into, as hounded, intimidated, and practically forced.
I digress.
Contracts have been around for a long time. I haven't used them in the past, since most of the partners I've had in the past were masochists, not formally slaves. We were all about playing with pain, and not about obedience and discipline. I was dominant by default, almost, because I was a natural at it, and it is the typical role of choice of the sadist, just as submissive is the typical role of choice for the masochist--thought it's not always the case. Nothing is set in stone in the world of sexuality--never fall into that trap. It might be set in stone for you, but it's not a good assumption to believe that every plays like you do.
If you do find yourself in a D/s (whatever form that takes) relationship, a contract is a good idea, not because it protects you legally (no court in the civilized world would defend your claim of ownership over another person), but because it provides a framework for the submissive in which to play, and it provides a level of comfort to know exactly what the rules are. Sometimes it's fun to play with loopholes, too, if you're into the whole bratty submissive thing...but if you're not, and you're looking for obedience, a formal set of rules to which you both agree (or you all agree, if you're poly) is a good start.
If you don't have rules, you could fall into the area of psychological abuse. If the submissive never feels like she/he is doing the right thing, if nothing they do seems to meet your expectations, if you constantly discipline for whatever you feel like labeling as wrong, your submissive may be in a constant state of psychological torment. It is my firm opinion that sub drop is more likely in this sort of situation, and it's more likely for a submissive to panic when she/he doesn't know what's expected.
Another value to having rules--and going over them from time to time--is that it tends to stimulate you and your partner sexually. That's been my experience, anyway. Go over them every so often, weeding out ones that seemed like good ideas when you first came up with them, but don't quite fit with the way you play or with the other things going on in your lives.
Still another good thing about rules is it is fulfilling for a submissive to know that she/he is doing a good job obeying them. If your submissive believes you are worthy of respect, even worship, obeying/following the rules, and even a particular routine or ritual, will provide fulfillment and keep your submissive happy and loyal--and, in turn, will keep you satisfied. They are your rules, after all. Tailor them to your benefit, and you will both (or all) be happy.
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