Punishment

If a dominant is to enforce rules, he must provide consequences for when his submissive breaks them.  Many people think simply of corporal punishment when they think about consequences for breaking rules in a BDSM relationship, but there are several strategies a dominant can use for punishment.  It does not always have to involve pain, and sometimes pain can be completely inappropriate for certain submissives.  Whatever the case, consequences should follow certain basic premises:

• Punishments should still honor hard limits.  They may push soft limits, but hard limits are full stops, and always should be.  While any consequences should fall outside of a sub's comfort zone, they should not include hard limits--the punishment will seem unfair and create resentment.  Think of hard limits as conditions of the relationship; they are things you both agreed you would never do, so if you do them, you've broken that agreement, and nullified the relationship.  
• Punishments should fit the severity of the offense.  This guideline should be common sense; unfair punishments will challenge a submissive's sense of justice, and will eventually foster disloyalty.  
• Punishments should fit the character of the submissive.  A masochist will not have the same punishment as a little, for example.  
• Punishments may push soft limits, but should remain safe, sane, and consensual.  Safe and sane should be straightforward, but if a submissive will not consent to punishment, then there should be talk about the status of the relationship and whether it can continue.  

The consequences of rule-breaking can take many forms.  Here are some examples:

• Corporal punishment:  This method involves inflicting pain as the consequence of breaking rules.  It may include anything outside of the submissive's hard limits, from spanking to whipping, caning to flogging--any pain, to the level appropriate to the severity of the indiscretion. 
• Uncomfortable positions:  This method is almost a subset of corporal punishment, because the discomfort itself may become painful, but not necessarily.  It may include restraints that restrict movement and keep the submissive from getting comfortable, imprisonment in a small cage or one that requires standing, or standing in the corner with her nose against the wall and hands behind her back.  
• Isolation from the dominant:  Some submissives consider having to stay away from the dominant the worst form of punishment.  With this method, you can have the submissive sleep on the floor or at your feet at night, stay in a cage or closet, or stand/kneel/sit in the corner quietly.  
• Tasks: With this method, the submissive must write an essay, do research, or do some kind of labor she wouldn't do normally.  The preference for labor would be something meaningless, possibly something that can be reset and done over again.  
• Humiliation:  Anything that makes the submissive feel ashamed, in public or private (within hard limits) will suffice.  It could be taking a picture of her holding a degrading sign; walking in public without makeup, hair done, in revealing or shabby clothing; cumming on her face and catching it on camera...there are lots of ways to humiliate and degrade a submissive.  Of course, if she's into that sort of thing, it might not be punishment at all--just as pain might not be appropriate for a masochist. 

I tend to give my slave choices of punishments...and sometimes an opportunity to do something special for me instead.  I usually reserve the special favor for minor rule-breaking, such as forgetting to shave her legs or neglecting to show me gratitude for giving her the pain she enjoys (and the reactions I want from that pain).  Often, I will use her breasts, especially her nipples, as a point where I inflict the pain of punishment, because it's not a hard limit, and it's a very sensitive area for her.  

It perhaps should be noted that not all BDSM relationships require punishment.  Not everyone operates under strict rules and protocol.  For those who do not, disagreements may be settled the way any couple might settle disagreements.  However, for those who do enjoy playing with rules and protocol, it is necessary to establish rules.  Punishments may remain undefined to allow for creativity, as long as they remain fair and within the hard limits defined, but rules should be defined clearly.  Declaring that a sub has broken a rule that hasn't been previously defined can make a sub paranoid and anxious, and that falls under the notion of abuse.